we are not called to understand God

I came to God with a mountain load of worries today. As I was riddling off my fears on my way to class I ended my list with a simple prayer.

God, please help me to trust you.

Life is overwhelming. It is messy. It is hard. And honestly, sometimes it scares me.

But it is in the midst of my anxiety and doubt that the Lord takes my hand and whispers, “daughter, I already have it all figured out.”

I cling to the promises that I hear in that still, small voice.

I know the plans He has for me are so much greater than anything I could ever plan for myself. I know that He has been preparing me for such a time as this. I know that He has His hand on the knob of each door I need to walk through and will open them in His good and perfect time. I also know that He closes the doors that don’t lead me closer to Him.

And it is because I know all of this that I don’t need to know the rest.

Hear me on this:

We are not called to understand God. We are called to trust Him.

This world is big but my God is so much bigger. The future is scary but my God has foreseen every second of it. Anxious thoughts are heavy but my God supplies abundant peace. I make plans but my God makes better ones.

And oh how deserving He is of every ounce of my trust.




I craved an honest love

Can I press pause on your Valentine’s Day for just a sec? I have a quick question for you.

Are you focused more on pursuing a relationship with the guy that caught your eye in history class or the one that hung on a cross for you?

I only ask because I know what it’s like to be the girl that routinely lets satan whisper lies in her ear. I listened as he reminded me of insecurities and shame and doubt until I wondered if I could ever be worthy of an honest love. I craved that. I prayed earnestly for it. I did my best to find it on my own.

Sometimes we let our desires cloud our vision and steal our peace. Sometimes we forget whose heart we should be pursuing above all else. Sometimes we listen to the lies.

But the enemy never offers us something we don’t already have.

Maybe you need to hear this today: if you’re letting God direct your steps, you’re not going to miss out on what He has planned for you.

Stop rushing. Slow down. Good things will come in God’s time, not yours. He knows exactly what you need and when you need it. He knows exactly how many days (or valentine’s days) you need to spend single. He knows who the right person is and when you need to meet them. But He also wants to be the top priority in your life.

Please don’t forget that we serve a jealous God.

This powerful, magnificent, holy, jealous God did something incredible for me. He gave me that honest love that I prayed so desperately for, and He gave it to me before I ever began to think I needed it. I was desperate for something I already had.

His honest love saved me. It wraps around me in the fire and holds onto me in the storm. It takes my hand in the valley and humbles me on the mountaintop. It surpasses my understanding and tugs relentlessly on my faith. It painted the cross red and washed the sin from my name.

Can I tell you the best thing about that honest love?

It’s offered to you too.

Happy Valentine’s Day

A Girl Becoming a Woman

I am flawed. 
I often give into fear instead of choosing courage. I care too much about the opinions of others and let words hurt me more than they should. I overthink and worry about the future. I always choose pizza over salad. Sometimes I stink at having patience. To be completely honest, I’m not the girl I want to be most days.
But in the midst of my weaknesses I am reminded of something beautiful. 
Even when I am messy and complicated, Jesus is strong and steadfast.
Even when I struggle and fall short, Jesus upholds every promise.
Even when I do not love myself, Jesus loves me fully.
He knows my name. He looks after my heart. He designed me in his own image. He died for me. 
And while I am imperfect and fall short of who he calls me to be, he loves me still. I am his- the daughter of the king. The girl who’s still becoming the woman she fully intends to be.